Tag Archive: life


I am a sucker for romance. On Monday night I watched three ‘romantic comedies’ in a row. I love when the girl gets the guy and everyone lives happily ever after. I love the swell in the music, the look of realisation, the declaration. Ok so I am a sucker for bad movie romance as well as everyday romance.

I, like most people, have had my ups and downs when it comes to romance. I’ve had regrets and I’ve done stupid things but I have also learnt from them. I have learnt that you can’t go around breaking people’s hearts because someone nicer comes along but I have also learnt that it isn’t healthy to stay in a relationship just because the other person loves you when you don’t feel the same.

I can hear you all groaning already; ‘Oh here she’s goes, spouting about how she’s grown as a person or lecturing us on love.’ I promise you I’m not doing that. This is me in a state of shock. Today marks one year since I met my girlfriend, Rhianna and the past year has been wonderful.

I have also realised something over the past year. One day, I want to be the girl in the movies. The girl who has her perfect day. A day with a cake and a white dress, well two white dresses. A day with laughter and music and love. Ewww I think I might throw up myself, bet I beat you all to the bathroom!

Ahh now that the being sick is over I might get a little preachy. Under current legislation I’m not allowed that perfect day. So if you are living in Scotland I want you all to do something wonderful for me. Got to the Scottish government’s website and fill in their consultation on same-sex marriage. It isn’t fair that I’m not allowed to get married to the person I love because they happen to have boobs! If you aren’t living in Scotland and you happen across this blog then I urge you, forward to people in Scotland. Or if you are in the rest of the UK then soon they will be launching a consultation, respond to that when it comes out.

The provost for St. Mary’s Cathedral in Glasgow said in an interview (to little journoface me): “I want gay members of my congregation to be able to walk safely down the street hand in hand and safely up the aisle hand in hand.” This is an incredibly beautiful thing that more and more religious figures are feeling and one I hope will spread to those who don’t.

Preachy part over, now back to the disgusting fuziness. A year ago today my life was changed, although officially this didn’t happen until about a week and a half later because I got drunk and made out with some random in the Cathouse (eww), and I just wanted to say; Happy Meetiversary Rhianna. Don’t get scared off by the marriage part. I won’t make you put on the white dress until the government change this law…

Time well spent

When I’m not working or at college I do find myself with a ridiculous amount of free time. I know that in reality my time should be spent doing things like this.

This is the finished product for my desktop publishing unit at college. I’m quite proud of it because I didn’t go to many of the classes and still managed to pass. I think it looks quite professional (if I do say so myself!) and it definetely helped me learn my way round InDesign.

However, I tend to spend too much of my time doing things like this.

This would be from a very thrilling time in my life where I spent a day watching Disney films and tying the contents of a packet of strawberry laces together.

When there happens to be a lack of strawberry laces in my life I tend to resort to amusing myself in one of two ways.

Watching one of the many DVDs I own… of which I wish I had many more.

Or reading. I love to read. I will read almost anything. I even managed to make it through all four Twilight books even though I often wanted to throw them out the window!

I also spend some of my time drawing. I used to draw a lot more when I was a teenager but I do still like to dabble from time to time. I will draw pretty much anything but have been trying some Anime-style people lately as a new challenge.

And when all else fails I guess I could spend some time with that lovely girlfriend of mine!

This is my wonderful girlfriend when we were in Paris. And she does take up all of the remainder of my spare time.

Sometimes I feel I need to do something more productive with my spare time but then I realise that I spend my spare time doing things that I enjoy and with people I enjoy spending time with. Definetly time well spent.

I was genuinely thrilled when I met an absolutely stunning girl in the most unlikely of places. A gay bar. I was even more thrilled when this girl liked me. And things got even better when I realised that for the first time I was dating a girl who devoured books like they were necessary to live like I did.

Browsing through the freshly pressed blogs I came across someone who planned to do some summer reading and as Rhianna was reading over my shoulder and gasped at the brilliance that this blogger had a reading club with her partner we decided we had to do the same.

We hurriedly emptied the books onto the bed and talked over which ones we had read and which ones we wanted to read. We have a joint list and a list each. They are very ambitious lists but we will get through them, even if it means our booktastic summer of fun turns into a booktastic year of fun!

Rhianna’s list

The Sacred Art of Stealing – Christopher Brookmyre
The Ingenious Edgar Jones – Elizabeth Gardner
Grave Secrets – Kathy Reichs
The Game – Neil Strauss
The Night Watch – Sarah Waters

My list

Lost Souls – Poppy Z Brite
All Fun And Games Until Somebody Loses An Eye – Christopher Brookmyre
A Gathering Light – Jennifer Donnelly
Charlotte Gray – Sebastian Faulks
One Of Our Thursdays Is Missing – Jasper Fforde
Shades Of Grey – Jasper Fforde
Devil Bones – Kathy Reichs
Interview With A Vampire – Anne Rice

Joint List

The Magician’s Guild – Trudi Canavan
The Rotter’s Club – Jonathan Coe
The Hippopotamus – Stephen Fry
When They Lay Bare – Andrew Greig
The Broker – John Grisham
The Court Of The Air – Stephen Hunt
The Football Factory – John King
My Beautiful Laundrette – Hanif Kureishu
The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo – Steig Larsson
A Short History Of Tractors In Ukraine – Marina Lewycka
Brothers – Ted Van Lieshout
Broken Angels – Richard Montanari
The Time Traveller’s Wife – Audrey Niffenegger
Pygmy – Chuck Palahniuk
Burton on Burton – Mark Salisbury
Them – Fay Sampson
Girl Meets Boy – Ali Smith
A Series Of Unfortunate Events (all) – Lemony Snicket
Dracula The Un-Dead – Dacre Stoker
Tipping The Velvet – Sarah Waters
We – Yevgeny Zamyatin
The Book Thief – Markus Zusak

Every flavour? Just about.


I would like to introduce you to the reason I accidentally flashed the postman and nearly vomited. Bertie Bott’s Every Flavour Beans, of Harry Potter fame.
Being a Harry Potter fan for years and having grown up alongside Harry, Ron and Hermione I always wished that certain elements of the books and films could spill over into real life.
I was lucky enough to be sent to a boarding school in a remote location in Scotland with four boarding houses and Quidditch (ones of those may not be true) however that was as far as the comparisons went.
I grew up wishing I had an invisibility cloak that I could use to sneak around the school when everyone else would be tucked up in bed and hoping that Centuars lived in the forrest but one thing I have never wished for was Bertie Bott’s Every Flavour Beans to exist, the chocolate frogs yes but good old Bertie can keep his beans!
That being said however, I found the door being knocked on at an unreasonable time in the morning. A mixture of intrigue and the horrible thought that if it was the postman and I didn’t get up I would have to venture to the sorting office to get the mystery package led me to wrap the nearest blanket around myself and head to the door.
I suspected that my step-mum was sending me something because she had asked for my address a few days before, I have lived there for two years and this was the first time she had asked. I was expecting a note saying they had moved house and no new address, or something equally as evil step-mother-like (I would just like to point out that she isn’t actually evil but as she is a step-mother I am allowed to joke). However, I was handed a small package by a postman who seemed to admire my green spotted blanket.
I took the package with glee and headed back to bed, ripping open the package to find a packet of jelly beans with a note attached that read ‘enjoy – but be careful as there really is every flavour!’ I wish I had learned how to recognise good advice at Hogwarts.
That night I sat on my bed and sorted the packet into colours, just like I do when I eat Smarties or Skittles, and proceeded to nibble half of each type and coercing my poor, unfortunate girlfriend into eating the other half.
Much to her disgust I sat reading the leaflet that described each bean while forcing her to eat soap, vomit, bogey and sausage flavour, wanting to be sick while also wanting to see how each tasted. Among the very, very bad were some also quite nice ones. Grapefruit, sherbert lemon and green apple all being very tasty.
I am now banned from giving my girlfriend sweets.
Alas, earwax. Dumbledore had a right to show some caution over these sweets and I certainly learned my lesson.
After trying every flavour I hurriedly wrapped the blanket around myself and ran to the toilet in the fear of losing my stomach contents. As my girlfriend seemed to admire my blanket I looked down and realised that it wasn’t the blanket the postman had seemed so interested in.
Well hopefully that means none of my post will ever get lost again!

It was brought to my attention while doing another monotonous supermarket shift in my effort to pay some bills that I say sorry far too much. I said sorry to one of my collegues seven times in the space of about two minutes because I accidentally used his printer instead of my own, I knocked something over, I took too long to use his handset and the list goes on.

After he got rather frustrated at me for apologising so much and he asked me to stop what did I do? That’s right. I said sorry.

I then remembered walking down the street and bumbing into a lamp post. I apologised to the lamp post. I apologise to my stuffed animals when I’ve left them lying on my floor and I accidentally step on them (yes at twenty years old I still own stuffed animals). I apologise to thin air when I burn toast and set the fire alarm off.

I am an apology-addict.

Except for the times when it matters.

Did I actually mean any of the apologies from above? The work mistakes were common things that everyone does and noone apologises for. The lamp post and the air don’t need my apologies. I might have meant the apologies to my stuffed animals but we’ve been through a lot together. But even though I am addicted to apologising (my name is Stefani and I’m an apologyholic) I just can’t apologise when I need to.

I’m stubborn so while I will apologise to thin air for burning toast I can’t for the life of me apologise when it matters because in reality the words have lost their meaning.

I need new words to say I’m sorry when I really mean it. From here on I am in search of a word or two that I can use when I do something horrible and awful and have to apologise (this will probably be used mostly towards my understanding girlfriend who knows that no matter how many times I grumpily snap at her I won’t apologise unless I burn the toast or step on Floppy the Rabbit). This new word(s) can be real words or made up ones. Jam jar. Apolositations. Just a few examples.

I am also going to stop being such an apology-addict when I don’t mean it.

Damn. I just kicked my bag. And apologised to it.